Simple

Blessed.... enough said :)

Gal Pals

This weekend was filled with wedding prep. My MOH, Teresa and I spent our entire Saturday running around town getting things lined up, looking at decorations, dresses, shoes, jewelry, etc...It was a fantastic day spent with my fantastic friend. It is amazing how my friendships have changed as I have grown older. I no longer think of my close friends as merely friends, but they have grown into my family. Teresa and I have been friends for almost 10 years, and it seems that each year, our friendship grows to new levels. This girl has stuck by me through so much, that without her, I think I would be lost. She often knows when something is wrong by noticing a look, a tone, etc. I am so lucky to have her and other gals around me to fill my heart with happiness.

If I had a piece of advice for people, it would be to hold your friendships so incredibly close to your heart. When you surround yourself with people who constantly encourage, push and stand by you, your amount of confidence grows.

How have your friends influenced your life? What is something that your friendships have taught you as you have grown older?

Roots

Last weekend at church we began a series about maintaining strong roots in relationships. The sermon focused on forming strong roots within a marriage. How fitting for me! The main idea, though there were several aspects of importance, was that marriages often die when one or both of the people focus on the ME rather than the WE. I have to say, looking back on my past relationship, I can definitely see that was something that played a big role in the fall. Now, since I am lucky enough to have a second chance at this thing called LOVE, with a man who is more amazing than I could ever have imagined, it is my mission to always put the WE before the ME. Will I falter at times? Absolutely. I just know that this relationship is the real deal. I need to treat it with all the care and attention that it deserves.

Have a great weekend! Any big plans???

Mama

My mom is my rock. For the 29 years that I have known her, she has always stood strong, anchored, ready for what life throws at her. She has always looked at life as an opportunity and welcomed the challenges that it brings her way. While I was growing up, she worked 3 jobs in order to support herself, my dad and kids while my dad was laid off. There was never a minute of hesitation, just determination to provide for her family. She did it all...

My parents divorced when I was 11. It was during that time that I again saw the strength that my mother possessed. She worked, went back to school and took care of me and my siblings. She was up before the sun and wouldn't sit until the moon was high. She again, did it all...

Just over 10 years ago, my mom began experiencing numbness along with a bluish tint in her fingers. After examination, it was determined that she had a slight blockage in an artery that would require her to have a stint placed across her chest to remedy the symptoms. Sounds simple enough....

After the procedure, my mom woke up in excruciating pain. A pain that medicine wouldn't fix. After further investigation, it came to light that during surgery, my mom's surgeon pinched a nerve, leaving it without blood flow for over 20 minutes, causing permanent nerve damage running down my mom's right arm. To put it in easy to understand terms, my mom's arm felt like it was on fire. The nerves were constantly "firing" causing an unmeasurable amount of pain. After medications failed, she again went under the knife to cut the sympathetic nerve in the hopes of ending the pain once and for all. We all waited in anticipation for her to wake up and see the outcome. Sadly, she was just as bad, if not worse than she was before. In a matter of months my mom went from doing it all to needing someone to help her do the simplest things. She had to relearn to write, how to hold her fork, etc. Seeing my mom like this was something I was so unprepared to witness. Throughout my life she has been unstoppable. She was the one always handing out help, but had now become the one needing it.

More months went by with no end to her pain. Clothes were painful, as her pain spread from her arm to her chest, back and hip. It was then that she was referred to a pain clinic in Cedar Rapids where she received 7 electrodes placed into her spine with a remote inserted into her belly to transmit electric shocks to deaden the pain. This, at times, seemed to work. However, our success was short lived, as her body became immune to the unit and no longer supplied her with the relief she needed.

Throughout this journey, my mom has been diagnosed with Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy (RSD). RSD is a disorder that is characterized as severe chronic pain that includes a burning sensation. My mom went from invincible to fragile. It has been over 10 years since I have been able to give my mom a hug with both arms. I can't squeeze her, just gently pat her good side. She has good days as well as bad. But the thing that astonishes me, is that through her pain, my mom is still living her life. Loving her family. Doing it all....

Dinner by candlelight

Last night Dave made one of my FAVORITE dinners. It is shrimp and pasta with this yummy garlic/olive oil mix with cilantro, cherry tomatoes and a whole bunch of other goodies. So, in our quest to have Lane eat what we eat, I was a bit nervous. First of all, he has never had shrimp so I was nervous over that. Second of all, he has an aversion to anything GREEN that is present in a dish. As dinner was ready, Dave thought that it was a perfect time to have dinner with the table lit with nothing but candles. This wasn't done to set the mood for later, it was simply to disguise the greenness of the dish for Lane! Lane was pumped by the different scenery and dug into his dinner! Bravo, Dave on a fantastic idea!

Lane wasn't a fan of the shrimp. Though, this wasn't really a shocker to me. He liked the flavor but the texture was a bit strange for him. I told him we would try it again sometime soon. He wasn't opposed to it as of yet, so lets keep our fingers crossed that he too will fall in love with shrimp!

Wedding update: We are meeting with a caterer tonight. Keep your fingers crossed!

Papers, pens and OCD

I must say that since becoming engaged 11 days ago, I am one organized bride-to-be! Dave, as well as many others would call me slightly over organized, but hey, a girl has to know what's goin' on! My boss did laugh at me yesterday for having a file thingy with all of my info in it. But..after explaining my OCD (which he fully sees on a daily basis) he backed off. :) I can not STAND it when I am unorganized. ( Now, if I could only keep my clothes off the floor and jewelry in the box my life would be grand!) So, I did what any girl would do....I walked into Staples (I heard angels singing) and bought a file folder, notebook and new pens. Yes, I really did need the new pens. You CAN NOT leave staples, or any other office supply store without buying pens. It is office supply store ettiqute!! Though I must say that I am slightly disappointed in the way my new pens write. Don't act like this statement is off the wall, I know there are many gals out there that prefer one pen to the next if our writing looks better! :) Oh well, they will have to do for now. After all I (and Dave) have a wedding to pay for! No more stinkin' pens (for now, hehehe).

Ok, so I pretty much just rambled on about a whole lotta NOTHING! On that note, I'm gonna say see ya lata!

Back among the living

Hey folks! I'm back! Sorry for my slight hiatus! Had a sick kiddo! You moms and pops out there know how that goes! Lane got sent home on Thursday with a headache and fever. I was instructed by the nurse that he was not to return until he was 24 hrs without a fever without the help of meds. Well, the fever returned on Thursday night, which meant a snuggle day on Friday was to be had. Little did I know, both Lane and myself would be going stir crazy by 10am! I understand the school rules, but it is definitely puts a kink in my weekly routine when I have to take almost 2 full days off of work. With one of them being for the simple fact that he isn't allowed back. UGH! Oh well, he is back to his crazy, energetic self and back to school today!

OH YEAH!!!! I went wedding dress shopping this weekend! SOOOOOO fun! I took Dave's mom and my friend Julie (who is also a bridesmaid) I tried on well over 20 dresses. I think I found "the one" but am going this weekend with my MOH, Teresa so she can give me her opinion too. Can't wait!

Have a happy Monday!

Pee Man strikes again!

Lane's pee appeared to have eyes for his schools bathroom floor yesterday, as he proceeded to pee on it. UGH! He had a character check sent home for me to sign which brought with it a timeout and no DS for a week. He feels really bad for his bad day yesterday. :( It is always hard for me to sometimes dish out the discipline on his "off" days. Heck, we all have them! Mind you, the majority of us, I do believe would refrain from tinkling on the floor, but we all have bad days, pee or no pee...

Today however, started off splendid! Dave left for a business trip in Orlando this morning so it was just the two of us. Lane got up early and snuggled in our bed watching cartoons. He did a great job listening this morning which brought on some extra snuggle time before leaving! Man how I wish he would be a snuggler forever!!! If he keeps his good attitude today, I am sure it will be great!

Wedding plans are in full swing! Going dress shopping this weekend and next! Wish me luck! I have also found great, crafty ideas for table decorations. SO exciting!

Happy Thursday!

Does your pee have eyes?

Apparently, Lane's pee has eyes enabling it to see the toilet and know it is time to release. Oh the conversations of children! Here's the back story...

Last night, Lane was playing his DS and apparently was unable to feel the pressure to go potty. This lack of pressure caused him to have an accident. This accident went unnoticed to him until dinner time when the DS distraction was turned off. While at dinner, Dave and I asked the obvious question..."Why didn't you pause your game to pee?" His response..."Well, I think my pee has eyes that look for the toilet, when they see it, the pressure comes and I can pee. When I'm not by a toilet, they can't see it so the pressure isn't there and I don't know to pee" REALLY?!?!??

I think I sat there open mouthed for a few moments at the thought that my child REALLY thinks his pee holds human characteristics. Should I be concerned?! :) Maybe I should ask him if he pee has a brain which can be used to think about going potty on a regular basis.

I guess the moral of this tale is that you never know who or what may be peekin' at you at any time and more potty breaks are in our future.

Happy Wednesday!

P.S. Wedding planning update... Got hair appointments booked and going dress shopping this Saturday and next to find me somethin' purdy for my fella :)

Let the planning BEGIN!

It has been 4 days since I became engaged and we have already set a date! October 8th...that leaves around 8 months to plan this shindig! Wowza! Dave and I decided to get hitched at a beautiful winery outside of Dubuque. We love wine, but traveling to a California winery is too expensive so it seemed like the most logical idea! :) PLUS, we lucked out with someone canceling for that day the day before I called. Talk about fate!! I am now in the mode of picking out colors, invites, thinking about caterers, cakes, linens, etc... Did I mention that my head might just spin off my shoulders if I don't hold it still?? Oh well, it is all part of the madness that leads up to the happiest day of my life when I get to marry the man of my dreams :)

Day of Love

Trying to find the right words to describe the events of this weekend seems impossible. To say that I feel so incredibly blessed and lucky in my life, at this moment is an understatement. I feel as if my feet have been levitating off the ground and my jaws hurt from the constant smile that is across my face. Why, you ask? On Friday evening, before our pre Valentine's Day dinner, Dave asked me to MARRY HIM!!!!!! It was a moment filled with so much emotion and love.

Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I would ever find a man like Dave. He is someone who loves me for me. He loves the no make up, hair a mess, dressed in sweats Sarah. He makes me happier than I ever imagined I could be and for that, I am forever grateful. I love him to pieces and can not WAIT to start our life together!

We are just dipping into the planning, thinking of September or October of this year. YEAH!! :) I have a feeling that many future posts will pertain to the planning and such, hope it doesn't bore you! Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Hug somebody you love!!!!

Here's the song Dave had playing as he asked me to MARRY HIM!

TGIF

It's Friday! Not only is it Friday, but it is Valentine's Day date night for Dave and I! Can't wait!! :) A night with my honey, good food, good wine, great conversation! Can't WAIT! :) :) Lane is headed to Minnesota for the weekend with his grandparents, so Dave and I will get some catch up time. Life gets so busy that it is nice to take a break and reconnect. The weather is FINALLY suppose to be warming so that is definitely another plus!

I am smilin' today and I hope you all are too! Have a great weekend! Anyone have any great plans????

Mr. Tude's return

Mr. Attitude has returned! He has returned with a vengence, leaving me exhausted. Yesterday, when picking up Lane, I was met with a scowl and him yelling at me that he didn't want to leave! I'm sorry child, but are you the one who drives the car, makes your dinner, cleans your clothes?? I don't think so bucko! Reluctently and quite loudly, he gathered his belongings, which by the way, he managed to lose his 3rd hat of the winter season, and went to the car. Once situated, I asked him why he was so angry. He responded that he just started watching Brendon play his DS and pretty much the world was ending because he was asked to leave. The things that he flips out about sometimes leave me with my head shaking in confusion. He continued his tantrum on the way home which correlated to a timeout that he didn't agree with. While pulling into the garage, he told me that he wished he was an adult so he could do as he pleased. He then continued to sit in the car for several minutes until he could come inside and act appropriately. I don't allow that behavior in my house, so he had to apologize before moving on. Dave and I are really trying to work with him on the idea that his actions cause a consequence. I think he is finally getting it...a little.

This morning attitude again reared his ugly head with the beloved DS. I told him that he could play it for a few minutes before leaving. But again, once he was asked to turn it off and get his boots on, the yelling and growling began. Ugh! Dave took over with this one and they had a heart to heart which made Lane again realize that his actions and decision dictate how his day will be.

Lets hope he turned it around and has a good day!

Daydreamer

When I was a child, I would sit for what seemed like hours staring at the sky, daydreaming of far off lands behind the clouds. Things were so simple then. No worries, just dreams. I see that same thing in Lane today. His imagination is what drives him. I look in his eyes and see the possibilities that run through his mind. His excitement is contagious. In his eyes, he can be anything. I hope as he gets older, that light still burns. I hope he knows that his opportunities are endless. This world can be a harsh place at times, yet I hope he keeps his fire and sees the good within. I hope he loves with passion, stands up for what he believes in, doesn't settle for less than he deserves.

I also hope that I, as his parent, do my part in keeping those things alive in him. I hope I can continue to push him to new levels, yet be there if he falters, to stand back when I should and allow him to make his own decisions. It is so hard to let go, even at his young age of 5. I want to surround him in this bubble of comfort and stability, yet know that he needs to learn to break away, little by little. We work so hard as parents to provide our children with what they need. To love, punish, push, preach, encourage, listen....the list goes on. We then hope that what we did was enough. Is it ever enough???

Surprises, Super Bowl and Mr. Mouse

OOOOH what a weekend I had! Lets start with the surprise part first, shall we? So, my cousin Erica's birthday is this week and my cousin Shawna decided to throw her a surprise party on Saturday. I wrangled myself into the planning by baking the cake and making some snacks. Saturday afternoon I zoomed to Dubuque for the festivities. The look on Erica's face was absolutely PRICELESS!! LOVED seeing her so surprised and excited!! If only Mr. Migrane wouldn't have shown up half way through the night, I would have had no complaints. But since he insisted on invading my head, I was forced to cut my part of the party short and have a date with Excedrin, a dark room and a pillow. :(

Sunday was Super Bowl Day! I must say that this was my first Super Bowl party ever and because of the fun I had, I can't wait until next year! The festivities were held and my best friend Teresa's house. The food and laughter were in abundance! Those are the nights I love, surrounded by amazing friends and laughing until your belly hurts.

Now on to Mr. Mouse...before leaving for the party, Dave and I were in the kitchen making goodies to take with us. From the corner of my eye, I thought I saw something move underneath the cabinets. Sure enough, Mr. Mouse scurried himself across the kitchen and dashed behind the washer! (I have to say that I am QUITE proud of myself for not screaming and jumping on a chair! I simply yelled MOUSE! MOUSE! MOUSE! and pointed like an idiot!) Dave and I tried with no success to hail him from his hiding place. That meant a trip to the store for traps! We set 4. 3 by the washer and dryer an 1 by the microwave, as this seemed to be where he had been feasting on our bread and produce! Let me tell you, finding mouse droppings in my produce basket isn't the most appetizing thought. Because of Mr. Mouse, I had to throw away my favorite little basket and all of our freshly bought produce! GRRR! I had to disinfect the counter tops check our pantry to make sure he wasn't feasting in there as well! Luckily, this morning we had a catch! Poor Mr. Mouse is now peacefully sleeping in the garbage where he belongs. :) By the way, Lane absolutely LOVED the idea of catching a mouse, as his favorite show is A&E's Billy the Exterminator. He said to Dave as he was getting the traps ready. "Dave, we're gonna trap 'em and snap 'em!" He couldn't wait until this morning to see our catch! Have I mentioned lately that I love his excitement for the little things?! :)

Have a happy Monday everyone!

Dicipline or Abuse...You be the judge

This morning on my way to work Dave texted me about a story he heard on the news about a mother in Alaska who makes her child hold hot sauce in his mouth and take a cold shower when he is caught lying. When I hear of these things my stomach turns. Intentionally causing harm to your kids because they do something wrong seems greatly unjustified. Now, I have to admit, I have used the threat to Lane before of putting soap in his mouth if he continues to talk badly. I never have followed through, thank goodness and because of this news story, I never will. I know that we as parents definitely lose our cool from time to time. God knows I have. We all make mistakes and do things that we are not proud of. However, the idea of having those actions as a consistent form of discipline is unsettling. For goodness sakes, your child would be terrified any time they make a mistake or do something wrong! Our children should not live in fear of their parents. Should they know that we are an authority figure and that they are to treat us with respect? Of course! But it is our job as parents to treat them the way that we expect them to treat others. If we consistently treat them with no regard, then it is almost a positive that they will grow up thinking that that behavior is acceptable.

I'm not in any way saying that I have all the answers here. Hell, half the time I am googling parenting tips to try to better myself!! But when I read stories like this, I can't help but think of Lane and if that were to happen to him. This morning, I accidentally tripped him when we were walking in the living room and felt horrible! I know I could never go to the extent of throwing him in an ice cold shower when he is in trouble! Take away a toy, do a time out, TALK to your child about WHAT they did wrong and think of solutions TOGETHER to try to fix the behavior in the future!!

Thanks for letting me be on my soapbox this morning. What are your thoughts on this? How do you dish out discipline in your family?

If you are interested in this article, check it out!

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/02/03/earlyshow/living/parenting/main7313415.shtml?tag=contentMain;contentAux

Snowday! Sorta....

Happy Day after Blizzard! Luckily for our area, we didn't get TOO much snow...we got around 5 inches where other areas got well over 12inches! The darn wind however wreaked havoc at our house leaving a nice big snow drift in front of our garage, nicely placed behind MY car!!! GRRR!! I keep telling myself that I need a big girl car instead of my dinky one!

We found out last night that school was indeed canceled for today and that daycare was opening at 7. So, there I was this morning, almost completely ready when I received a text message saying daycare wasn't opening until 10. REALLY??!?!?! Couldn't they send that out BEFORE I left my nice warm bed??? Another GRRRR!! Oh well, I got some time to snuggle on the couch with my boys and watch some tube. Dave had to bring me to work today since my car is still being held hostage in the garage!

If any of you are home today, have a cup of cocoa for me!

Therapy, growing, changing...

Lane had his 3rd therapy meeting today. It is definitely a long process but each time I think we both come out of it with more understanding and the ability to change. Today started off like the past 2 where the Dr. asked how Lane has been with his behavior, if I have seen anything different, triggers, etc. I was so happy to report that his outbursts and anger has greatly decreased. However, when it does make an appearance, it is through outbursts and hurtful phrases such as "I hate you" and "I don't love you". As his momma, it is pretty tough to hear at times, especially in the produce department at the grocery store as I pick out bananas. The doc said these phrases are used as manipulation to get his desired outcome. However, since i don't give in to his wants, the behavior is slowly starting to change. Thank goodness!!

We also talked a lot about how Lane really dislikes talking to his father on the phone as well as the idea that Dave and I many times have to prompt the conversation, telling Lane what to say. I was told that I should no longer enable the relationship between them. That it is not my job to keep it going. Lane's dad needs to learn how to effectively communicate with him. He also thinks that I shouldn't force Lane to talk to him just because I am trying to keep their relationship established. This is something that will definitely be a challenge for me because it will be a struggle to make his father understand the reasoning behind it. I have always thought that as a mom, it is my job to push Lane's relationship with his dad. However, the Dr. is making me realize that I am spending too much time worrying about something that is not in my control. I need to focus on my family here...myself, Lane and Dave. The three of us are a family and that is what Lane associates us as. We are supplying him with the love, support and structure on a daily basis.

Back again in 3 weeks!

Before I go, just wanted to share with you a great song that describes Dave and his relationship with Lane. The two of them are inseparable. It is so humbling for me to watch them together. This song was the first thing I heard today after leaving the appointment...