This morning on my way to work Dave texted me about a story he heard on the news about a mother in Alaska who makes her child hold hot sauce in his mouth and take a cold shower when he is caught lying. When I hear of these things my stomach turns. Intentionally causing harm to your kids because they do something wrong seems greatly unjustified. Now, I have to admit, I have used the threat to Lane before of putting soap in his mouth if he continues to talk badly. I never have followed through, thank goodness and because of this news story, I never will. I know that we as parents definitely lose our cool from time to time. God knows I have. We all make mistakes and do things that we are not proud of. However, the idea of having those actions as a consistent form of discipline is unsettling. For goodness sakes, your child would be terrified any time they make a mistake or do something wrong! Our children should not live in fear of their parents. Should they know that we are an authority figure and that they are to treat us with respect? Of course! But it is our job as parents to treat them the way that we expect them to treat others. If we consistently treat them with no regard, then it is almost a positive that they will grow up thinking that that behavior is acceptable.
I'm not in any way saying that I have all the answers here. Hell, half the time I am googling parenting tips to try to better myself!! But when I read stories like this, I can't help but think of Lane and if that were to happen to him. This morning, I accidentally tripped him when we were walking in the living room and felt horrible! I know I could never go to the extent of throwing him in an ice cold shower when he is in trouble! Take away a toy, do a time out, TALK to your child about WHAT they did wrong and think of solutions TOGETHER to try to fix the behavior in the future!!
Thanks for letting me be on my soapbox this morning. What are your thoughts on this? How do you dish out discipline in your family?
If you are interested in this article, check it out!
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/02/03/earlyshow/living/parenting/main7313415.shtml?tag=contentMain;contentAux
Poor kid will never be able to put hot sauce on his eggs again! What about salsa? This woman has ruined him for life!
ReplyDeleteOk...kidding aside...she is a mother of SIX!!! Article states the child is from Russia...I can only assume he is adopted. This poor kid probably doesn't stand a chance to be well rounded.
I have spanked Lane 3 times and I do feel it was the appropriate action. I felt HORRIBLE each and every time. Poor kid has not learned the lesson of not diving for and grabbing ankles...last night he got kicked in the chin and I think I felt worse than he did!
What brings you to a point in life where you think FORCING this child to HOLD hot sauce in his mouth is a good idea?
The one rule I have adopted is to not threaten something I won't follow through on. So...yah...no threats about cold showers or hot sauce. We bought a bottle of HONEST TEA (a real brand) a few YEARS ago and it sits in our fridge. We tell the kids that its a truth serum. So whenever we want the truth, we just bring out the bottle. They spill their guts immediately. It's pretty much the most awesome thing ever. :)
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